Thursday, April 26, 2012
10:00 AM | Posted by Lady Gray | | Edit Post
I spent an embarrassingly large chunk of my life looking forward to adulthood. It was so obvious even to relative strangers that when I finally went off to college, my mom's nail lady remarked that she thought I had gone long ago. I've spent so much time looking ahead to what was next, I'm sure there is a lot I missed.
It wasn't long ago that I realized when you wait so long to be something, when you are finally there it is a little anti climatic. Now with a husband and a new home, I feel like I've finally arrived. Adulthood. I've been waiting for you all my life!
Now that I'm closer to 30 than 20, I'm starting to look forward to a new decade. As someone who has always felt older then her actual age (mentally rather than physically), I'm looking forward to this next chapter!
I've got a few years to go, but I stumbled upon this old Glamour article, recently reposted on the Huffington Post website. "Turning 30: 30 Things Every Woman Should Have And Should Know" lists some ways you can look back on your first three decades with fondness and forward with hope. I won't repost it here, but instead will be identifying how each applies to me.
By 30, I will have/hope to have...
1. A peace about my past relationships. Now that I'm happily married and have a better handle on what love truly looks like, I've been able to look back on those I invested my heart with. Every relationship had a lesson. I like to think that each one taught me how to be a better wife for Mr. Gray
2. With a new empty house, I imagine there will be a few furniture purchases on the horizon. While I do have pieces that I bought and love, since I live so far from my family, the number of items that were someone else's first is ONE. The one item that traveled 3000 miles with me is an old antique chair that definitely needs refinishing. It is something I cherish.
3. Since I tend to live in suits, I can appreciate needing that one perfect "interview" outfit. I picked that up a few years ago and it hasn't failed me yet!
4. As a frequent business traveler, I've had my share of suitcase mishaps. Its never something I thought to invest in until recently, but I'm done purchasing cheap carry-ons that seem to only last 6-8 months. Having a suitcase and purse that is constructed well is absolutely worth it.
5. This ties closely to #1. Although I raced through my teens and 20s, there were certainly missteps. I made a decision a long time ago that regret was not something I would let slow me down. I can honestly say I do not regret any decision I made getting here. My path was unique and any change would mean a life far different than the one I see now.
6. Oh the stories I can tell (and have told)! Letting go of regret has allowed me to laugh at my mistakes and turn them into entertaining tales of self deprecation. You have to learn to laugh at yourself!
7. This one is much harder for me. The women in my family don't seem to recognize the word "retirement" and I suspect I'm cut from the same cloth. As I get closer to starting a (larger) family, this will be something I will be planning for.
8. As a newlywed, I'm still making the transition to be a "MRS". Mentally this was done long ago, but financially we are still figuring out what works for us. I've had a lot of wives with married years in the decades tell me to just dump it into one big pot, but the independent side of me is rebelling against that a little. Right now I don't believe I'm compromising marital happiness by holding onto this. Ask me in 10 or 15 years if I have the same opinion.
9. For the first time, having some success professionally is relieving some anxiety about my experience (or perceived lack of). I am optimistic about this part of my life.
10. Resettling in a new part of the country has definitely given me perspective on my friendships. I've been lucky to find some solid girlfriends that will drop what they are doing to talk if I need it and vice versa. Being able to have someone you badger to move next door is a great feeling.
11. I learned a few years ago to be handy with power tools. I may not have a cordless drill, but when I got married, I'm the one who brought the tools :)
12. I can think of a few things in this category. The mission now is to stop feeling bad about frivolous purchases that have already been made and focus on smart financial planning in the future.
13. This is something I work on everyday. By making a list of my priorities and taking time every week to look at my schedule and make sure I am including things that I want to do, I am making some progress.
14. I won't say that I have this nailed, but dedicating to taking care of myself is something that I have been working on for years and is already an important part of my life. I don't need to be motivated to go out for a run or head to the gym, I'm already there!
15. Looks like I'm a bit ahead on this one :) Things can always get better and I look forward to the surprises the next few years will bring.
Later, I'll go through the things I should know by 30!
For your own inspiration, check out the article or go find the book that just released! I know I will definitely be adding this to my library!
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